X-Men Origins: Gambit by Carey, Yardin, Roberson, Fairbairn
My rating: 3 of 5 stars
Mystery Poo is code for Shallow Readers are overwhelmed by buddy reads, and need time to catch up.
Don’t judge us.
Not my favorite. And the more I think about it, the more I realize that it’s simply because I’m repulsed by that awful headgear he wears around on his face.
What the fuck is that thing?
As far as I can tell, it’s only there to make his hair pouf out of the top. Or maybe he’s got a really round face, and it’s supposed to help his cheekbones looks slimmer or something?
Ugh. Take it off, Cajun! It’s ratty looking!
And then there’s those ridiculous gloves.
Can someone please explain to me why some of the fingers are cut out and some are not? Come the hell on, dude! That look is not going to catch on, so stop trying to make it work!
As far as this origin played out?
Eh. Not bad, but it wasn’t awesome, either.
When Gambit was a little boy he jumped into danger to save a little girl. Turns out her father was the head of the Assassins Guild. Gambit’s father is the head of the Thieves Guild. When the two grow up, they get married.
It’s Romeo and Juliet!
Except the fathers’ want to join the two guilds.
Anyway, as soon as they say I do, her brother jumps up and challenges Gambit to a fight to the death.
Gambit’s mutant powers kick in, and he kills the guy with an exploding knife to the chest (or something like that). Everyone freaks, because…?
I don’t know! What?! They didn’t notice that his fucking eyes had been red the entire time they knew him?!
I mean, look!
He’s saying his vows, and looking at his fiancee with these beady red rat-eyes, and nobody thinks anything about this?
You have to be a special kind of stupid to miss warning signs like that.
As far as I’m concerned, if you die in a fight because you ignored the fact that the dude’s eyes were glowing, then all that happened was that Natural Selection won the day.
Anyway, Gambit’s wife bargains for his life and gets him banned or excommunicated or something. All it means is that he can’t return to the area.
Wait. You kill a guy and your punishment is that you can’t live in Louisiana?
Ooooookay. Well, that’s harsh?
But he won’t let his new wife come with him, because…reasons.
He starts out as a thief for hire, but when his mutant abilities get out of control, he ends up working for Mr. Sinister, because he has the ability to help him.
However, their relationship takes a sour turn when Gambit realizes that Mr. Sinister has sent the Marauders on a mission to exterminate the Morlocks.
Gambit decides to take off on his own after saving a little Morlock girl.
Fade to Black
I guess this is supposed to be what Gambit did before meeting the X-Men?
It told the story, but I didn’t feel much heart from this one. However, it wasn’t the worst origin story I read.
PS- If you’ve never watched Gambit get fired you’re missing out on one of the funniest things EVAH.
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