My rating: 4 of 5 stars
It starts out like this coming-of-age story about the first time Suzie cleaned her fur coat.
Unlike the rest of us, she didn’t just twitch and sigh.
Of course, she assumes that’s what happens to everyone when they rub one out, and spends a good portion of her adolescence trying to figure out how to delicately ask someone else how the whole clam digging/time stopping thing works.
By the time little Suzie grows up, she’s finally figured out that this isn’t what normally happens when you scrape the cheese off the taco. So, she’s just sort of floating along…living life, flicking her bean, stopping time, and working in a library.
And then she meets Jon.
OMG! When Jon unclogs the drain, he has the same power as Suzie!
Which, obviously, leads to a deep and meaningful relationship. I mean, that is a pretty special talent those two crazy kids have, and it’s not like they can share their feelings and experiences with most of the people they run into, right?
So, what do you do when you’re young, in love, and have the ability to stop the world every time you polish your wedding ring?
Rob a bank! Duh.
And how well does that turn out for them, you ask?
Not as well as you might think, since there are apparently a group of people who police this sort of behavior among their kind. I know! Whodathunkit?!
Anyway, they call themselves…The Sex Police.
There are puns a-plenty in this sucker.
But there’s more to Suzie & Jon’s story than just a little B&E.
Now, I’m not going to spill the whole story, but I’ll give you a taste…
Anyhoo. If you’d like to learn more about why Jon is taking a dump in his boss’ office plant, then you should definitely pick this one up.