My rating: 4 of 5 stars
After the first few pages I thought I was going to have to reach out and cyber-smack Mike, Gavin, and ‘kris for suggesting I read this…but it sort of grew on me.
I don’t mind violence or gore in the books I read, but I also have this thing about putting gross stuff in my mouth. Call it a phobia if you want, but just the thought of anything icky coming near my mouth makes me gag and heave.
Take food, for example.
I constantly sniff any food that I think might be even a little bit iffy. Then I make my husband sniff it. And usually even if he says it smells fine, I end up throwing it out. Because…who cares what he thinks? Once I think it it may be tainted, it’s got to go.
It’s Mentally Tainted Food, therefore, I can’t eat it.
Also, I thought Chew was just a clever title. I ordered it from my library on the above mentioned recommendations of FRIENDS, and didn’t bother reading the blurb. My bad.
Bird Flu has made chicken into the new moonshine. Which, once I realized what was going on, was pretty darn funny.
I mean, bootleg poultry? That’s hilarious!
And the new FDA is like the FBI, CIA, and NSA all rolled into one. Forget Homeland Security, if you want to be where the action is, you join the Food and Drug Administration.
Bad-ass health inspectors? Bwahahahha!
And Tony Chu (get it, Chew? Har!) is one of the guys who puts his life on the line everyday to keep the world safe from contraband chicken.
His partner ends up getting hit in the head with a meat cleaver in the first few pages, and to catch the bad guy…Tony eats a portion of one of his minions.
Don’t worry, it makes more sense in the book.
When he’s found at the scene cannibalizing the guy who split his partner’s skull open, he gets fired and institutionalized.
Because that’s NASTY!
That’s not what happened. That’s just how my gag reflex rationalized the scene.
What actually happened was that it put Tony on the radar of another government group that utilizes people with his skill.
His skill is to be able to get a clairvoyant reading off of anything he ingests.
And if he had only eaten vegetables throughout the book, I and my stomach would have been much happier…thank you very much.
But he didn’t.
He ended up (reluctantly) eating all kinds of horrifying things in order to solve his cases.
That vacuum-sealed dog almost did me in…
*GAK GAK GAK*
Again. Thank you for that, guys.
Here the thing, I honestly got interested in what was happening to the entire cast of wacky characters. I was so nauseated, but I couldn’t stop reading!
And then they left me with a cliffhanger!
So. When I recuperate, I’ll read the next volume.